REWRITING NORMAL
A monthly newsletter about the joy and challenges of raising a child with a disability and the process of writing about it!
Welcome to my first newsletter! Here’s a peek into my writing and my life.
Being a caregiver for a loved one with disabilities is endlessly rewarding and endlessly challenging. I hope to offer some insights from my own experience raising a daughter with special needs, as well as resources that may be helpful for the caregiver community. If you’d like to learn more, subscribe below.
I’m excited to announce my memoir – The Shape of Normal, A Mother’s Journey from Disbelief to Acceptance will debut next year (Vine Leaves Press) and will be available for preorder sales in August 2023.
So, the first thing people usually ask me is, “Cathy, what made you write this book?”
My answer is invariably, “I had to.”
With firsthand knowledge of what is involved in raising a child with a disability, I wanted to share what it felt like to be the parent who often felt like an outsider around other parents of typically developing kids. I had two other children, one of them, Jessica’s twin. It took me years to see that Jessica wasn’t someone who was ‘broken.’ And it took me years to understand that she did not need ‘fixing’, that I was the one who needed to change.
Once I accepted this, something else emerged: the need to illuminate what it’s like to parent a child with cognitive disabilities. It’s time we focus on the similarities rather than differences between able-bodied children and children with disabilities.
Here’s an excerpt from one of my earlier drafts of my manuscript.
“Your daughter Jessica is profoundly retarded.”
The string of words yanks like an invisible chain, back to that moment in 1988 when the doctor made his decree. Those five words launched a journey I struggled to navigate for twenty-four years.
In my hands, I hold the embossed silver frame. I slide out the photo and turn it over. In blue ink, I had written the date. April 5, 1988.
My mind reconstructs the scene. Snippets of details; the cold room, the red leather chair, the click of a pen, the tears. The meeting ended. My husband clasped my hand. I remember the way the neuropsychologist rose from his seat. I deliberately swept past him and headed into the hallway. For one split second, my mind had conjured an entirely different scene. What if I could change the ending?
Four years ago, while I began my search for an agent, I realized I had to establish myself as a writer. I had no idea this wasn’t easy! But according to some of my writer friends, I’ve been relatively successful. Out of one hundred and eighty submissions, I have had sixteen essays and stories published, including excerpts from my memoir, in Newsweek, Bacopa Review, Grown and Flown, Brevity Blog, Mother Magazine, Manifest-Station, Chicago Writes, Kaleidoscope, and Uncomfortable Revolution. And although I continue to suffer from “imposter syndrome,” getting a publisher to say yes to my book was major validation.
Visit my website
http://www.cathyshieldswriter.com
So great to read about the journey of an amazing writer!